The Worst City in Europe? | Bruges Travel Guide
How do I even begin to describe the quaint township of Bruges?
I could reference the film In Bruges, as I've seen so many other travel writers do. Apparently the 2008 film starring Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson has inspired more than one to visit the medieval city. My initial thoughts upon arriving were not of the cult classic which probably should have sprung to mind, but instead of Pleasantville - the 1998 film where two siblings get stuck in an old black-and-white sitcom and are forced to confront the sunny yet somewhat empty disposition of middle-class suburban America,
Except I hadn't wandered into 1950s post-war suburbia - I was in Belgium.
The historical centre of Bruges is a UNESCO world heritage site. It is one of the best-preserved medieval cities in the world. Walking in from the bus stop I passed under one of four gates - the remnants of which used to be a wall that encircled the city, built in 1AD. I arrived on a Sunday, wandering unknowingly into a lively weekend market. Couples swept past walking hand-in-hand, and children wove between the stalls, all scrapped up elbows and dirty knees. Locals breezed through, laughing and playfully kicking each other, causing their bicycles to swerve and bump over the cobblestones. Everyone was happy and laughing - maybe that's why Pleasantville came to mind. Right then I realised that everyone who told me Bruges was a great place to visit was either lying or delusional.
Don't get me wrong, it is true that Bruges is beautiful, but it's just that. Beautiful. To be completely honest the three days I spent there I was borderline bored shitless.
Okay okay, maybe I'm just being cynical. There were certain parts of Bruges I enjoyed, although I’ll admit most of the city felt a little like a facade. As my dormmate so adequately put it, tourists rarely leave the centre - then they'd see the real Bruges and that would kill the magic. So as expected the inner centre of the city was amassed with tourists and expensive chocolatiers, horse-drawn carriage rides for €50 a pop and the scent of hot waffles in the air. The city is connected by a network of canals, and if you can beat the crowds a pleasant half-hour boat ride will only knock you back about €8. I was told by hostel staff to avoid hiring a bicycle for a day so instead, I explored the city on foot.
The day I arrived I went on a waffle hunt and ended up at Oyya. I had been told previously that only tourists ate their waffles covered in white chocolate and raspberries and cream and sprinkles and ice cream and so forth - the locals eat them plain, so I asked for mine with just a bit of icing sugar. The next few days I wandered the city aimlessly, looking for stuff to do that wouldn't completely empty my wallet. I climbed The Belfrey, and the view from the top was stunning, as was the mechanism inside that brings beautiful music to the city. It's essentially a giant music box, although I'll admit I was expecting huge bells and a little old man. I also went to a gallery showcasing the works of Salvador Dali, and later the Medieval Torture Museum - it's about as grotesquely fascinating as it sounds. The Fritz Museum gave me a basic historical overview of the common potato (I'm not kidding). I also visited The Chocolate Museum. The initial draw for this activity was the free samples but believe it or not, Choco-Story was actually quite interesting. Then, of course, I went to The Groeninge Museum - it’s a must-see for any art lover.
I avoided the expensive restaurants/obvious tourist traps advertising traditional Belgium fare, and opted for takeout and cheap cafes - I ended up having lunch at Tattie's twice. The traditional tearooms proved expensive but worth the extra euros. My last night in Bruges I threw caution to the wind and decided to splash out on a decent dinner. I ended up at Sol y Sombra, a Spanish tapas restaurant I spied a few minutes from my hostel.
So is Bruges the worst city in Europe? Probably not but one or two days here is probably enough. I read somewhere that Bruges is one of the most romantic cities in Europe, so maybe the city is not so bad if you've got someone. I certainly spied many happy couples both foreign and local skipping happily through town. But to those travelling skint, solo and/or recently broken-hearted (like me), beware. Hell is an eternity spent in Belgium’s city of love.
A Quick Guide to Bruges
What to see in Bruges
The Belfrey is a must-see. Climb to the top for a spectacular view of the city. The guided canal tours are great for finding out more history about the city. You could also opt for a horse-drawn carriage but I found them a bit expensive.
There are also various other historical sites around Bruges that are very beautiful and easy to track down. The Groeninge Museum is full of traditional Flemish art, and best of all there are barely any tourists there and selfie sticks are banned - ask the receptionist about the time she was nearly beheaded by one. Tattie's is a great little cafe not far from the city centre. It's cheaper than most of the tourist traps in Bruges and the food is delicious.
Where to stay in Bruges
I stayed at St Christopher's Inn - this infamous hostel and its adjoining pub was a great place to stay. The only downside was that the internet connection was weak and unreliable from my room, but hey we could all use a break from technology.
What to try in Bruges
Fries with mayonnaise are a must-try in Belgium. I also couldn’t get enough of the hot waffles from Oyya.